Partly Cloudy Skies
When love is fresh, everything is possible and wonderful. Dave had a Sunbeam Alpine sports car. In cool weather, the car’s hard top kept us warm and toasty. In summer, we enjoyed the rag top down. He thought I was attracted to him because of his car but that was far from the truth it was reminiscent of the Geek’s green sports car.
Around that same time, I’d been wearing a green, corduroy coat, a terrible color for me and the fabric had an unpleasant smell. One side of the belt loop was fastened with a safety pin. It wasn’t like me to wear something in despair, it was a literal picture of my depression. I was the one who broke up with Barry so why was I feeling so blue? Dave and I drove to Eugene, he bought me a beautiful navy-blue coat with fancy gold buttons. I went from the depths of my despair to being treated like a princess.
We went to the Oregon Caves a tourist attraction which is a huge cavern. The caves had an occasional narrow passageway. When we got to the first opening it was too claustrophobic for me to go any further, it reminded me of all the dark places I had experienced with nowhere to run. Mercifully, there was another passageway. When the entire group got to the big cavern it was total darkness but the guide lit a candle the light dispelled the darkness at that time it was a symbolic picture of my life in Christ.
Friday nights were our official date nights. Dave took me to a steak house restaurant, every week I ordered steak and baked potatoes. Eating there was such a treat because our family rarely ate out and my girlfriends and I only went to fast-food drive-ins. Something I found funny. Dave had cereal bowls in the kitchen sink the leftover milk had spoiled and Cheerios had grown mold. I’m a neat freak but for some reason, it didn’t bother me. However, I immediately washed and dried the bowls and spoons.
Not everything was good. It was spring the weather was mild, perfect for riding his motorcycle along country roads, often beside the Umpqua River. I would put on a triangular scarf so my hair wouldn’t get windblown. He said, I looked “different,” which wasn’t a compliment in my mind, and the next ride I didn’t wear it. One of the largest problems was Dave wasn’t a believer. I watched women in our Baptist church sitting alone in the pews, their husbands weren’t there. I was determined I wouldn’t be one of them. But I was doing the opposite. I accepted Jesus when I was six but didn’t really trust him after I had been sexually abused, I kept questioning why had it happened.
Dave had Jim Beam whiskey in a kitchen cabinet. I’d never been around any liquor. He mixed it with Coca-Cola and it became our drink of choice. On New Year’s Eve, two other of our newly-wed friends decided we’d get drunk, stupid I know, but thankfully drinking wasn’t a habit we’d carry into our marriage.
In his apartment on a side table, he had a stack of Playboy magazines. When I leafed through the pages and looked at the pictures of the Playboy bunnies, I knew I didn’t measure up. Today it is deeply embarrassing for him and he is so sorry for the impact it had on me.
We started having sex regularly, every other night as I remember. We used the rhythm method and didn’t have sex when I was ovulating. Each time I’d promised myself never again, like I did with Barry, but I didn’t keep the promise. We stayed out late every night. Yet, I needed to be sharp for work the next morning. To solve the problem, I took No-Doze high-caffeine pills in the morning. It didn’t occur to me that I could go home earlier, love can be so blind.
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